Hippie Lady Ideas


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Struggling To Find a Purpose?

Me too…

I struggle every day.  I haven’t so far been able to find my main purpose in life. I lost two people I love in the past three years or so.  One of these people had been with me my entire life and the other was my best friend since we were 12 years old.  Both of these people struggled in the same way as I.  I didn’t realize that until today.  My dad actually found his purpose late in life.  I thank God for that everyday.  He was an artist it turned out and a damn good one.

The other person died in bed alone, probably feeling like a failure.  We weren’t close in the end.  Two people who both struggle with depression don’t usually help each other very much and although we loved one another that love made it to where we could no longer look at each other or even talk.  It was too painful to watch and we couldn’t do anything for each other anymore.  We were and I am still emotionally crippled.

Recently I’ve come to realize how much not having a major life purpose is impacting my life.  The quality of my life is impacted and my happiness is suffering grotesquely because I feel like i’m floating aimlessly.  I don’t believe that a mere job will solve this severe depression that has come over me because of the lost empty feeling of having no purpose.

One thing I’d like to clarify; I know in this moment, that this is my personal demon.

The problem is, I am a people pleaser. I want my purpose to please the person I am in a relationship with.  I can’t handle a displeasing attitude around me.  It makes me question my ability, my intelligence, my purpose. When I don’t get full support in the form of interest and feedback I partially blame my partner when I back off what prior to the displeasing attitude I thought was MY PURPOSE.

Crazy?

My partner thinks nothing of it if I am displeased with his choices.  My partner had a purpose prior to meeting me.  I wonder sometimes if him knowing his purpose early in life makes him more independent and confident in all his choices.

Should he care more or should I care less?

If I think less of what he finds displeasing will I become more like him and possibly find my purpose?  Am I allowing my fear of others displeasing attitudes stifle my choices and my purpose in life?

How can I find happiness by disregarding my partner’s feelings and thoughts on something as relevant as a major life choice and purpose in life?

 

 

Hippie Lady Ideas

 

 


Leave a comment

Struggling To Find a Purpose?

Me too…

I struggle every day.  I haven’t so far been able to find my main purpose in life. I lost two people I love in the past three years or so.  One of these people had been with me my entire life and the other was my best friend since we were 12 years old.  Both of these people struggled in the same way as I.  I didn’t realize that until today.  My dad actually found his purpose late in life.  I thank God for that everyday.  He was an artist it turned out and a damn good one.

The other person died in bed alone, probably feeling like a failure.  We weren’t close in the end.  Two people who both struggle with depression don’t usually help each other very much and although we loved one another that love made it to where we could no longer look at each other or even talk.  It was too painful to watch and we couldn’t do anything for each other anymore.  We were and I am still emotionally crippled.

Recently I’ve come to realize how much not having a major life purpose is impacting my life.  The quality of my life is impacted and my happiness is suffering grotesquely because I feel like i’m floating aimlessly.  I don’t believe that a mere job will solve this severe depression that has come over me because of the lost empty feeling of having no purpose.

One thing I’d like to clarify; I know in this moment, that this is my personal demon.

The problem is, I am a people pleaser. I want my purpose to please the person I am in a relationship with.  I can’t handle a displeasing attitude around me.  It makes me question my ability, my intelligence, my purpose. When I don’t get full support in the form of interest and feedback I partially blame my partner when I back off what prior to the displeasing attitude I thought was MY PURPOSE.

Crazy?

My partner thinks nothing of it if I am displeased with his choices.  My partner had a purpose prior to meeting me.  I wonder sometimes if him knowing his purpose early in life makes him more independent and confident in all his choices.

Should he care more or should I care less?

If I think less of what he finds displeasing will I become more like him and possibly find my purpose?  Am I allowing my fear of others displeasing attitudes stifle my choices and my purpose in life?

How can I find happiness by disregarding my partner’s feelings and thoughts on something as relevant as a major life choice and purpose in life?

 

 

Hippie Lady Ideas

 

 


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What is a Hippie part two

I posted a few moths ago “What is a Hippie part one”  This is going to be part two.  Instead of another general post about what I think hippies are, this is going to be about what kind of hippie I am.

I’m second generation hippie.  My parents and uncle Terry were the “original hippies” in my family.  You would never know this by looking at them now. But fortunately my uncle loves to tell the stories and pull out the pics on occasion.


He once shook the hand of Jim Morrison. My daughter may request his hand be stuffed and mounted someday. She is third generation hippie disguised as an banker/t ball mom.

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I’m not exactly a “fruits and nuts” variety hippie as one of my aunts like to call modern day hippies.   I do love fruits and nuts and I am definitely all about saving the planet as best I can being married to a man who works in the energy services field.We have a cabin “in the woods” we are planning on retiring there eventually  and it will be as close to “green” as we can get it and still not freeze in the winter. We WANT to be self sustaining eventually.

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We hunt. Some people are highly offended by this. A lot of people who are also hippie type are vegan. We NEVER trophy hunt and we are very much against this type of hunting. We don’t hunt very much. Twice a year and some years we harvest nothing. If there isn’t a old or injured deer to harvest and help thin the heard, we don’t take anything. We ALWAYS eat what we take. We don’t buy meat from grocery stores because of the disgusting treatment of industrially raised animals. We are careful and thoughtful of where our food comes from.  We only buy free range no antibiotic eggs from people we know. I know that some of you will still have a problem with me. All I can say is we are making efforts. It’s more than I can say for most of Americans.

We are grandparents.

We love them all.

I sew. I love to make pillows for my grandkids and anyone who will take one.

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Hippie Lady Ideas ©

I love to create anything with anything I find lying around.

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We ride motorcycles. We just started a couple years ago. We love it. We have made many really great friends while riding.  It’s a great way to connect with nature and yourself. I think a lot about life and what’s important to me while I’m on that bike.

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I wear many hats and I enjoy them all.

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Hippie Lady Ideas ©

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Hippie Lady Ideas ©

That’s me.  Not your typical hippie but my own kind of hippie.

Who are you?

Hippie Lady