She is here. She’s been here for most of his life.
She’s the one who lives here and loves him and worries about him.
He shut the door in her face.
He said he didn’t know she was behind him.
He didn’t apologize until she mentioned that she was talking to him and in mid sentence when the door slammed shut almost hitting her in the head.
He sneered at her when he finally said sorry after twenty minutes of being forced to stare at her while she over and over again replayed the scenario begging him to recall her talking to him. He says he doesn’t remember.
He knew the whole time that she was behind him. He shut the door in her face on purpose he later states, because he didn’t like what she was saying. She was talking about her plans for the day He sighs a obvious “I’m sick of you” sigh and shits out his apology.
Every apology is like eating a pile of shit.
He gets angry if she can’t believe anything he says because of the constant gaslighting. But that is not excuse. He said sorry for fuck sakes.
He tells her to listen to him while he ignores her. She listens and then repeats him word for word. If he doesn’t like the sound of his own words or her reply to them, he calls her a liar and denies his own words.
She is living with a person who gets angry if she asks why he changed his mind because “she shouldn’t be questioning him”
His punishment must be doled out in secret. Every infraction of assuming her advise is wanted or her insisting on being heard and replied to kindly must be dealt with appropriately.
No intimacy. All advances are turned down unless she lets him humiliate her.
Hitting on her friends until she has none.
Making promises and breaking them unapologetically.
Acting outraged and confused is his go to when confronted
Gaslighting her and making her question her sanity is a preferred method to crush her spirit and avoid responsibility.
She is sitting on the couch smoking a joint waiting for the end.
Her heart is broken.
She is tired, middle aged and has no sense of self.
She wishes she could disappear.
If she could just learn to stop giving out more unwanted advise and learn that she is insignificant, who knows what might happen.
Might be, he may change.
To be continued and continued and continued and continued.